Watching Reality TV

Oh boy, where were we? Sorry I missed last week, we were out of town and I was expecting to be able to watch the show and recap as usual. But a) we weren’t at my in law’s house when the show was on and b) the internet wasn’t working. Whoops! I hope everyone’s Christmas and New Years were as great as mine were. And now, let’s get back to the show!

To quickly catch you up (beyond this post, of course), last week TK and Rachel came in first and the Goths were eliminated. Sad to see them go, but their names were a pain to spell out every time. We’re getting down to the wire with the show here, which surprises me. Why do these finales always sneak up on me??

Teams are leaving Mombai, India (WHY do they insist on always sending these poor teams to India??) and are heading to Osaka, Japan! Can’t say that I’m sad that I missed a leg that took place in India, since it is almost always incredibly depressing. Anyhow, the teams leave, Nick and Don just behind the hippies. Ron and Chris leave after them and apparently Ron has had further trouble holding his frustration in where it concerns his daughter. Nathan and Jennifer leave and I’m a little sad that they’re still in it, since they are so dysfunctional. Anyhow, that’s it. Four teams left! Meanwhile, teams are scrambling for tickets and hoping to have the earliest flights available. (Meanwhile, I’m being distracted by the school closure/delayed start notices running at the bottom of my TV screen) Anyhow, all teams fly to Osaka, TK and Rachel are unsure if they’re in the lead or dead last. All the other teams are flying and they seem rather stuck so I’d go with dead last.

The second flight with the three teams on it lands first in Osaka and the teams hit the ground running. They find cabs that hopefully know where they’re supposed to be going. Ron and Chris are confident they’ll do well in Japan. Nathan and Jennifer get to the castle they need to search first and marvel at the beauty. They have difficulty finding the clue box, but eventually locate it and now need to take the cab to a train station. There they need to find a guy and ask him for a clue. Just… any guy? Ron and Chris arrive just as they’re leaving and also have difficulty finding hte clue. They get to it before Nick and Don, though. Nathan and Jen arrive and find their clue guy (who happens to be dressed in red and yellow) and find a Roadblock. Jen choses to do the task, which requires her to become a taxi driver. GAH. Hell no. And just after Christina said she wouldn’t want to drive in Osaka. And, sadly enough, Christina chooses to do the task and is horrified to find out what she has to do. Jen has difficulty deciphering where to take her couple, while Chris has difficulty figuring out how to drive the car. OY! Nick and Don arrive at the station and Nick choses to do the task. He accepts with gusto and also needs help finding out how to read his address. Back at the station, Don and Ron share snacks while waiting. Each driver has a strategy for finding their way to the post office, but ultimately Jen gets there first. She’s thrilled, now let’s see if she can get back again. Christina arrives next, followed by Nick. Jen makes it back first, and now they must take a taxi to a Buddhist temple and find their next clue. Christina meets up with her dad and they take off. Nick, sadly, is lost.

Nick? Still lost. TK and Rachel finally land and get going. Christina and Ron are concerned by their taxi driver’s health. Jen and Nathan take a moment to argue. They arrive at the temple and have a Detour: Sense of Touch or Sense of Smell. It’s either robot soccer or identifying a real flower amidst thousands of fakes. Nate and Jen and Ron and Chris go for the flower task (ugh!). Nick finally makes his way back to Don and they head to the temple at last. They get their clue and chose the robot soccer. Don isn’t wild about it, but Nick is enthusiastic. Nate and Jen bicker, Ron and Chris sniff. Nick and Don make one goal… score! TK and Rachel are still journeying to their first clue. Nate and Jen find their real flower and hurry to the pit stop which is at Tempozan Park. They want to finish in first place badly, as they haven’t yet. Nate and Jen have difficulty finding a cab that knows where to go. Ron and Chris finish as well and easily find a cab that knows where to go. Nate and Jen are frustrated.

Nate and Jen still search for a cab and Nate pushes Jen into a cab out of frustration. Oy. Ron and Chris, meanwhile, are getting along famously. He hasn’t lost his temper all day. Don makes his goal and he and Nick advance to the pitstop. Ron and Chris make it to the mat first and win a pair of electric cars! Wow! They are so happy to be in first place. It’s so cute to see them together and happy. Nate and Jen arrive in second place and are disappointed. But happy that they made it, if nothing else. At least Jen seems to understand that in order to come in first, they need to stop bickering. Nick and Don arrive shortly after and are happy to be still in the game. TK and Rachel, meanwhile, are WAY behind. We see footage of them completing the various tasks and finally making it to the pitstop. They are certain they are out of the game. HOWEVER! Non-elimination leg! Of course, they are considerably behind the other teams and with the speed bump in the next leg, they’re in a bad spot. I hope they can rebound (and get a handy “bunching” of some sort). So until next week…

To catch up on last week’s action, I suggest you read this post over here.

Can I just say how glad I am that Shana and Jennifer were eliminated?  The whining was legendary.  So we kick things off from the windmill in Lithuania.  Where will we go tonight?  TK and Rachel get to leave first (at 1am, ack) and they’re going to Croatia.  And I’m not spelling the city out either, so just use your imagination.  Kynt and Vyksin are right on their heels.  The other teams duly follow.   Some teams make reservations on the internet and others wait at the airport for the ticket agents to open up.  And some people choose to visit travel agents so they can check multiple agents at one time.  There’s much hubub about lines and losing places in lines and tempers are pretty much flaring.  It’s really hard to blog the ticket-furor, so just know that a bunch of teams are on the first flight.  And a few are not.  A&H accidentally purchase business class when that’s strictly verboten in the game.  Nathan and Jennifer sprint to the plane with Ron and Christina and Kynt and Vyksin and make it on board.  A&H get left behind.  Boo hoo.  Except they may be well and truly screwed this time.

They learn, however, from the travel agent that the teams flying through Prague will be delayed.  The teams flying through Frankfurt, however, don’t have totally smooth sailing.  They miss their connecting flight and have to get new tickets.  BAH!  TK and Rachel get on a flight but Nic and Don get on a slower flight.  Nathan and Jennifer, as it happens, get are in first place, closely followed by the Goths.  But Ron and Christina get to the clue first!  Wee!  They have a Road Block where they need to find a particular stone that fits in a particular wall.  Gah.  They finish, and now must make their way to the roof of the Fort of St. Lawrence.  The views are spectacular.  Ron and Christina do a zipline task that looks absolutely amazing.  How fun!  Now they have a Detour.  Short and Long or Long and Short.  Say what?  First they rapel and climbing a rope ladder, followed by some complication navigating.  The other is ziplining to the water and rowing a boat.  It basically depends on how much you want to get physical.  But Long and Short definitely sounds much better to me.  Most of the teams pick that particular Detour as well.  Ron and Christina have some difficulty rowing until Ron puts his foot down concerning rowing technique.  The Goths have trouble with their stone for a minute, before catching up with N&J.  Who, meanwhile, are bickering like it’s going out of style.  As usual.  Can these two agree on ANYTHING? The Goths choose the rapelling Detour because “it sounds faster”.  Gah.  At the same time, N&J hate each other.  There’s a news flash.  Ron and Chris make it to shore, closely followed by Team Dysfunction.  Somehow, N&J get the clue first and need to get to the pit stop at the “Stone Cross”.  However, they also must take a taxi.  Which they don’t.  They pay a local to drive them.  Ron and Chris get the pitstop clue and they do take a taxi.  (Of course, N&J tried to get in a taxi but the driver wouldn’t take them because they were wet from the boat.)  Jen freaks out.

She is extrapolating this difficulty into greater meaning about their deteriorating relationship.  WTF?  TK and Rachel FINALLY land in Croatia, they’re just WAY behind.  Ron and Chris make it to the pit stop FIRST and are completely blown away.  They’ve won a 12 1/2 foot catamaran.  Just what they always wanted!  N&J arrive, only to find out they get a penalty for not following the rules.  They have to go ALL the way back to the clue box and take a taxi back to the pit stop.  Jen sulks.  Meanwhile, the Goths take a taxi (imagine that) and get to the pit stop in second place.  Jen is practically in hysterics.  TK and Rachel are powering through the tasks with their usual grace.   N&J finally finish and you’d think they were just eliminated, the way they’re acting.  Nic and Don finally land and worry they’re at the back of the pack.  A&H land and hope they’re not at the back of the pack.

TK and Rachel take a cab to the pitstop while Nic and Don do their first zipline and see A&H getting their clue below.  Very close, this one!  But not that close.  I think A&H are screwed.  TK and Rachel check in fourth as A&H zipline.  Nic and Don are rowing their butts off (which is to say rather slowly).  A&H are right on their heels.  A is a much better rower than Nic.  But Nic makes it to shore first and they hurry to the clue box.  They rush to find a taxi and have a hard time finding one.  A&H are breathing down their necks.  Nic and Don get their taxi at last and are on their way.  A&H also get a taxi.  They run into some traffic so there are nails being bitten.  And?  It’s Nic and Don in fifth place at the mat.  They’re still in it.  A&H, however, are last and out of the race.  That’s too bad.  They were really good racers, but they just had some really bad luck with that whole business class fiasco.  BOO!

If you want to know what happened during last week’s show, check out this post.

Basically, it was a lot of drama. Nathan and Jennifer were bitter at A&H coming in first AGAIN (and not giving them a chance) and the Blondes were ostracized for U-Turning Lorena and Jason. Good times! This week, we start off with A&H leaving the pitstop, shortly followed by Nathan and Jennifer. They’re flying to Vilnius, Lithuania! They have to catch a cab (not so easy) and get to an airport. And they have to use an official ticketing office. The two teams get there at about the same time, but the airport is small and closed. They go a ticketing office and wait for it to open in an effort to get good tickets. The rest of teams slowly depart the pitstop as well. Everyone seems happy to be going someplace new after spending two legs in Africa. The other teams start catching up with the front-runners and several teams start to look online for tickets (NOOOO!!!). Ronald argues with Christina about their ticketing options. She’s very patient with him, but definitely getting frustrated. Meanwhile, Nick and Donald are still looking online, the fools. Kynt and Vyksin are making the same error. At least, I think they are. I’m getting mighty confused. Okay, maybe not. Nick angers the other teams by being sneaky about their flight information. However, A&H luck out by getting an English-speaking agent and getting a good flight while Nick and Don get a worse flight. To make matters worse, Nathan and Jennifer gets seats on A&H’s flight AFTER Nick and Don were told it was sold out. D’oh! Luckily, Nick and Don are able to switch for a better flight so they’re no so behind. The Blondes continue to be harped upon which causes them to argue amongst themselves.

The teams all fly to France and from there have three different connectors to Lithuania. Nathan and Jennifer, Shana and Jennifer and Azaria and Hendekea arrive first and start searcing for St. Anne’s Church. They’re closely followed by other teams, including Nick and Donald and TK and Rachel and Kynt and Vyksin. Ron and Christina are bringing up the rear from the last flight. Nick and Donald find the cluebox first. They find a Roadblock. It’s a “Deliver Items” type task that involves some difficult navigating. A&H find the box at the same time as Kynt and Vyksin. Jen and Nathan are arguing amongst themselves, they still haven’t found the church. Speaking of arguing, there are Shana and Jennifer and they’re nearly hit by a bus. Some teams rock this Roadblock, and others… don’t. Kynt and Vyksin finish first, and they must go to a new town (please don’t make me type the name), and find a museum. TK and Rachel get some help with their deliveries from a local so they’re able to finish very quickly. Ronald and Christina finish third and they’re on their way too. Hendekea and Nick continue to have troubles. H soon finds a local to help her as well though and then finishes. The Blondes show up and that makes everyone else nervous, especially Donald who is still looking for Nick to finish.

Kynt and Vyksin arrive at the next cluebox and they have to search for the Travelocity roaming gnome and bring him to the pitstop. There’s a TON of other gnomes though, so they have to look pretty hard. Shana and Jennifer finish ahead of Nick and Don but they’re right on their heels. Kynt and Vyksin find their gnome and the next clue is a Detour. Count Down or Step Up. They have to count pickets and write them down or walk on stilts. Oy. They chose stilts. Other teams are close on their heels, however. TK and Rachel choose stilts as well, as do most of the teams. Kynt and Vyksin get frustrated and decide to count instead. TK finishes the stilts and just has to wait for Rachel to finish it. Rachel finally finishes, just behind Christina (who still waits for Ronald to finish). TK and Rachel hoof it to the pitstop, at a nearby windmill. They’re rather closely followed by Kynt and Vyksin who finished their counting. TK and Rachel won a 10 day trip to Japan as a result of winning the leg! Jennifer and Nathan miscount their railings and are distracted by the villagers. Meanwhile, Ronald falls of his stilts.

Luckily, he’s okay and Christina urges him on. Jennifer and Nathan start recounting. Ronald and Christina are finally able to advance on to the pitstop. Yay! They’re in third place. Nick and Don beat Shana and Jennifer to the gnomes just barely. The villagers are totally distracting these people. Both the last teams choose counting. A&H come in fourth. Nathan calls Jennifer a bitch and they switch to stilts. He easily finishes, but she struggles. Finally she finishes. They arrive in fifth place which is better than they deserve. There is a lot of arguing amongst the Blondes. Nick and Don get to the pitstop in 6th place. Shana and Jennifer finally get their count right and arrive at the mat last. And? They’re eliminated. Aww. Except, not.

If you want to catch up on last week’s episode, check out this post.

This week we’re departing from Bingo in Burkino Faso.  Where will we visit tonight?  Azaria and Hendekea leave first and must go to a nearby village to find the chief and get their next clue (and a welcome gift).  The gift is… a chicken.  Their gift is placed in a bag and then they get their clue.  Must take a taxi nearly 100 miles to another town where they search for the next clue.  Oh, and they need to have the chicken with them all day.  Fun!  So chances are, we’re staying in Burkino Faso, sounds like.  It would be weird to have to drag a chicken around everywhere.  Nathan and Jennifer usurp Azaria and Hendekea while she’s in the bathroom.  They find the Detour!  Shake Your Pan or Shake Your Booty.  One is physical in nature, the other a little more creative.  Nathan and Jennifer are first up for Shake Your Booty and the judges were not impressed.  They weren’t creative so they get a 10 minute penalty.  Ouchies!  Nicolas and Donald choose Shake Your Pan wile A&H take their hand at dancing.  And they do a lot better than Nathan and Jennifer.  The judges like it and they get their next clue.  Now they need to go back into the village and find a market.  There is also a U-Turn at the end of the Detour.  If they choose to use it (and can only use it once), they can make someone of their choosing go do the other side of the Detour.  A&H pass it up.  They go to ANOTHER market back in the city they originally flew into.  Whew!

The goths do a great dance routine and are easily passed on to the clue.  The judges deem them “wonderful” (is this “Dancing with the Reality Stars”?).  Shana and Jennifer do a “Britney Spears” themed dance which gets applause from the crowd but is definitely cringe worthy.  They’re passed though, so there’s that.  Shana and Jennifer then choose to U-Turn Lorena and Jason. Ha!  TK and Rachel are just happy it’s not them.  Of course, Shana and Jennifer thought TK and Rachel were Lorena and Jason so that’s why they yielded them.  D’oh!  A&H and Nathan and Jennifer arrive at the market and find a Roadblock.  It involves goats, which should tell you something.  Basically, they have to deliver supplies on a bicycle.  Sounds like it could be frustrating.  Goat in a basket.  They’re like baby goats and they’re all crammed into these laundry basket type things and it’s just kinda sad.  But you know, it’s “The Amazing Race” and all.  A&H finish their delivery pretty well and get the clue ushering them forth the next pitstop.  Looks like much nicer digs than they had the previous night, so there’s that.  Nathan and Jennifer are right behind them and it’s a race to finish in first.

Meanwhile, Lorena and Jason are doing the Shake Your Pan portion of the Detour.  I admire how they just sucked it up and did it, thought they have to be frustrated by the Blonds.   Jennifer, to her credit, isn’t happy about the U-Turning, wishes they hadn’t used it.  But it was Shana’s decision who is determined that is a perfect strategic move.  It is literally a foot race to the pitstop and A&H came in first by literally a split second.  Jennifer is very bitter that they didn’t get first place, after A&H had already come in first once before.  Uh, doesn’t work that way, dear.  It’s unrealistic to expect them to hold back and let another team come in first.  Dur.

Lorena and Jason (being awfully positive this leg, by the way) are speeding towards the Roadblock as other teams do their task and hurry to the pitstop.   Vyksin reveals that Africa is starting to get to her.  It’s hard to see that this is how people live.  Shana and Jennifer have a difficult time finding where to deliver their goods to.  They worry they’ll soon be passed up by the team they U-Turned.  That’s called karma, girls.  Lorena and Jason are getting a little worried.  Christina and Ronald race to the pitstop, followed closely by Nicolas and Donald.  TK and Rachel finish their Roadblock as do Shana and Jennifer. The Blonds hurry to the pitstop while Rachel gets lost on her way back to the market.  Kynt and Vyksin finish in fifth place (with their chicken!).  Shana and Jennifer finish in fifth place (karma wasn’t too mean to them, as it happens).  TK and Rachel are finally on their way to the pitstop as Lorena and Jason arrive at the market.  They are still staying positive, which I love.  TK and Rachel finish in 7th place and are thrilled to be in it still.  Lorena gets a little sad on the way to the pitstop and Jason reassures her they’ll make a million dollars some other way.  They definitely seem to have grown closer through all this.  They arrive, predictably, last.  And they are eliminated.  She has learned to take things slower.  Too bad, I liked them a lot better this week.

If you want to catch up on what went down last week, check out this post.

We’re leaving, today, from The Netherlands. Lorena and Jason finished first so they leave first. During the pitstop, Ronald needed some medical help for a hernia he had developed. To which I say “What goes around, comes around, buddy.” I hate to wish an old man harm, but he was atrocious last week. Anyhow, the next cluebox is in Ouagadogou which is in the African nation of Burkina Faso. Can’t say I’ve ever heard of it, so this will be interesting. The teams, however, don’t KNOW that’s where this city is and they have to figure it out. Fun! Teams start arriving at the airport and they look it up on the computer information terminal and are able to suss it out easily enough. Other teams find out en route so they’re on equal footing, at least. The bad news: only one flight to this particular place today. EEP. That’s not cutting it close at all. It isn’t a problem for most teams (Nathan and Jennifer manage to squeeze on board an earlier flight somehow) and Ronald and Christina are cutting it DARN close. They arrive at 7:30 and have less than a half hour to make it to the gate on time. Of course, Ron’s hernia gives him trouble so he can’t run so well. Still, they make it and the other teams try to hide their disappointment. It isn’t as desperate as it seems (or maybe it is), there’s some technical difficulties and their flight is unexpectedly delayed. They all expect they’ll miss their connecting flight in Paris.

Of course, this puts Nathan and Jennifer WAY ahead. They easily make it on the flight to Africa, but the other teams race through the airport in Paris to make it. Aaaaand.. here they come. They all made it aboard. Nathan and Jennifer are annoyed. All teams make it to this unpronounceable (not to mention unspellable) city and hop in cabs. The teams arrive at the train station and find the clue box. Nathan and Jennifer get their first and find out they must take a train to Bingo. Much easier to spell. They’ll be dumped in the middle of nowhere and have to search for the cluebox. And if they aren’t paying attention, they could miss it. Oh and apparently? The next train doesn’t leave until tomorrow. D’oh. In the meantime, Donald crushes on “the sisters” (Marianna and Julia to the rest of us). The next morning, the train comes and everyone gets on board. Bunching much? Oh, and the train stinks apparently but having watched this show before, I expected that. Shana and Jennifer can’t stand the smell but everyone else ignore it easily enough. The stop approaches and the conductor announces it as “Bingo!” so everyone hops off. Not as easy to miss as we would have thought. They find the clue box and get a Road Block. And? Milk a camel. And apparently getting enough milk can be a challenge. No spilling! Lorena was really scared of her camel or something. Nathan spilled some of his. Oh, and once completed they have to drink it. TK finishes first and he and Rachel are in first place. Now they must lead four camels across the savanna to a bunch of nomads who will give them their next clue. Lorena keeps spilling hers and Nathan is freaked too. Slow and steady wins the race on the milking the camels. The next problem is everyone is not sure of where to go and leads their camels the wrong way and have to turn around. Nathan and Jennifer catch up and are in the lead with everyone else. Lorena is completely stressed out. Azaria is frustrated. Shana is on the verge of giving up and Marianna (or is it Julia?) has an uncooperative camel.

Everyone figures out about trying other camels and tries that. Azaria finally has better luck, as does Marianna (or is it Julia?) and Shana. Azaria and Hendekea get to move on, about the time that TK and Rachel get their next clue, which is a Detour. It’s Teach It or Learn It. Either teach English to children or learn the local language from children. Eep. I’d probably pick Teach, as TK and Rachel do. Lorena and Jason are officially in last place as Shana and Jennifer leave the Road Block. At the Detour, some teams have better luck than others (as usual). Hendekea and Azaria finish first and get the clue to go to the next pitstop, which is on the outskirts of Bingo. Meanwhile, a bad storm is coming in and Lorena and Jason are still milking. She’s losing her marbles, is what is happening. Meanwhile, Azaria and Hendekea (and their Fern) make it to the mat and win a 5 night trip for two to Bermuda. Nice!

Marianna and Julia finish their milking and move on to the camels and then the Detour. I think Lorena needs professional help, at this stage. Having her do the Road Block, in retrospect, wasn’t such a good idea. Lorena tries another camel on Julia’s suggestion and finally hits pay dirt. She drinks her milk and they catch up with the sisters on the walk to the village. The rest of the teams race to the mat. TK and Rachel, Nathan and Jennifer, Ronald and Christina and Kynt and Vyksin and Donald and Nick all pretty much show up at the same time and are virtually tied. Shana and Jennifer arrive at the mat in 7th place and Jennifer breaks down with happiness over not being eliminated. Lorena and Jason and Marianna and Julia are in a dead heat to see who finishes the Detour first. Both chose Learn It. Lorena and Jason ultimately finish first, but just barely ahead of the sisters and it’s pretty much a footrace to the finish line. Ultimately, however, Lorena and Jason make it to the mat first and are still in the game. Sadly, this means Marianna and Julia are eliminated. Sad to see them go, since they played such a clean game, but what can you do? And I never was able to tell them apart.

If you want to know what happened previously, check out this post.

Welcome to another week of trying to keep up with what’s going on and failing miserably!  Hopefully this will get easier as the weeks tick on and there are less people to talk about.  Azaria and Hendekea leave the pitstop in Ireland first and must fly to Amsterdam.  Wee!   Kynt and Vyksin leave next.  They’re psyched for Amsterdam.  TK and Rachel leave next and are mellow as always.  At least he is.  Lorena and Jason take off and she promises to be calmer this leg.  Nick and Donald take off and Nick fails at showing his grandfather patience.  Shana and Jennifer leave and are missing their facials and manicures already.  Nick and Donald get a flat tire, bad luck.  Ronald and Christina leave and she forgot her fanny pack already.  Kate and and Pat leave and follow Ronald and Christina.  No one stops to help Nick and Donald.  Shana and Jennifer say they would have stopped if the old guy was injured.  Nathan and Jennifer leave last and don’t seem daunted by their bad showing.  Marianna and Julia are en route and I don’t know if they left last or not.  Hard to keep up!  Ronald and Christina and Kate and Pat stop to check out flights on the internet and Ronald rides Christina pretty hard.  You kind of feel bad for her.  There’s the usual drama at the airport with getting on the first flight.  Donald and Nick just miss the first flight, due to their flat tire and their slow ticket agent.  Marianna and Julia miss the flight to Dublin altogether and have to wait for the next flight.  Which puts them seriously behind.  Nick and Donald hope to get on the flight to Amsterdam via standby, hoping to beat some of the later teams.  They got a little pushy which the ticket agents didn’t really care for.  Christina tries to intervene when her dad gets mad and bawls out Nick for being rude to the ticket agents.  He’s frustrated and she’s got to be embarrassed.  Nick takes it in stride, though admittedly he should have been nicer to the agent.

The first teams to fly to Amsterdam take off, while the remaining teams jockey for standby and tickets in the airport.  Marianna and Julia make it to Dublin before the rest of the teams are able to depart which makes them feel better but everyone else feel worse.  So the second flight to Amsterdam leaves and the teams take off at a dead run.  Azaria and Hendekea get the first train to the train station and are already halfway to the bridge by the time the other teams get to the train station themselves.  Detour!  Hoist It or Hunt It.  One requires brains and brawn, but the other requires persistence and agility (not to mention keen attention to detail).   Azaria and Hendekea choose Hunt It, while the next two teams Hoist It.  A&H are floored when they see the number of bikes they need to search through.  Shana and Jennifer choose to Hoist It, trusting in their upper body strength.  Hoisting is all about the knots, it turns out.  Lorena and Jason burn through the Detour and finish first.  Now they have to travel by bus to a rural village and find a clue box in a field somewhere.  Nathan and Jennifer are having issues with their knots.  Rather, Nathan is.  Kynt and Vyksin finish next and take off in search of the bus.  Shana and Jennifer finish next, impressive considering the strength required.  Nathan and Jennifer finish without further incident.  There’s some bunching at the bus stop but Kynt and Vyksin haven’t found it yet and get to it just as it’s leaving.  Doh!  Meanwhile, A&H and Donald and Nick are on their bikes.  TK and Rachel are having a heck of a time with their hoisting.  He’s not so good with the knots, turns out.

TK and Rachel switch spots and she’s able to finally master the knots.  So they finally finish and are on their way.  The first bus makes it to the rural village and they find a Roadblock.  One team member must Ditch Vault.  HA!  Of course, they have to fault over a muddy river so you can only imagine.  Jason does it for his team and makes it over in the first try.  They’re on the way to the pitstop, driving a bike-like contraption.  The last teams gets to the Detour at last when Shana makes it over the muddy river.  Ronald is the voice of pessimism.  He doesn’t like either Detour tasks.  Lorena and Jason make it to the pitstop in first place, making me wonder where A&H are.  They have won (each of them), a sport bike which sounds an awful lot like a tricycle.  Nate and Jen and Shana and Jennifer get to the mat at the same time and are teams 2 and 3 respectively.  Ronald continues freaking out at his poor daughter.  He’s not even happy when he finally finds his bicycle.  Ah, A&H were on the second bus!  “Pinky” is nervous of getting dirty and falls in.  And that’s not Vyksin we’re talking about either.  Ronald continues to berate his daughter, blaming all their being behind on her.  Nice!

Finally, Christina has had enough and vents on her dad, crying.  And he hugs her so maybe he feels bad.  We can hope.   Kate and Pat finally get their bikes and JUST miss the bus.  They are “superscrewed”.  According to my husband, the best kind of screwed to be.  For some reason, Donald is doing the jumping for his team and doesn’t quite cut it.  Kate and Pat take a bus-like vehicle.  Donald strips down to his skivies to jump and everyone is kinda of horrified.  TK and Rachel get a little lost on the way to the pitstop and Kynt and Vyksin make it to the mat in 4th place.  A&H and TK and Rachel make it to the mat in 5th and 6th place, respectively.  Donald is still trying to cross.  He finally makes it but he’s practically black with mud.  Marianna and Julia make it in 7th place, closely followed by Nick and Donald in 8th place.  Apparently Donald completely stripped at one point which makes it SO much worse.  Ronald is bossing his daughter around.  Again.  I just want him to shut up.  I can only imagine how she feels.  She makes it and he tells the camera he thinks he could have done it better. OMFG.  He volunteers to drive the bike-thing and they tip over.  GAH.  They make it to the mat in 9th place, finally.  He dares to tell Phil that the key is communication skills.  Kate and Pat are trying and trying but it’s already known they’re in last place.  Still, they have fun.  That’s great.  It’s too bad they’re last to the mat and are eliminated.

That’s all, folks!

Wee! It’s time for “Amazing Race” again! Easily, this is my favorite reality show. And this season we’re leaving from Los Angeles. I’m not going to go into who the teams are because there’s just too many of them. If you want to learn about them all, go here. Let’s just say there are plenty of opportunities to snark in this group here. It’s just a matter of who is going to get snarked on first. The teams arrive at a giant mansion in various automobiles to meet with the ubiquitous Phil. I must say, the Goth couple sorta freaks me out. They’re just so… bright. And dark at the same time. I don’t know. They’ll be easy to pick out of a pack for a while, I imagine.

Phil gives the teams the go-ahead to run to their backpacks and collect their first clue. And it is: Go to Shannon, Ireland. Sweet! I don’t think the show has ever been there before, so this will be awesome. Teams pile into their SUV’s… and immediately get into a traffic jam. Teams are giddy, as they always are the start of the race. I find that I’m giddy right along with them. Some teams are having no problem finding the airport and others are… less successful. Vyksin? Are you kidding me? Oy. I find myself watching the teams and wonder who I will love and who I will hate. And who will be eliminated first, of course. The teams seem to be navigating some very nice neighborhoods here. There’s urgency to get to the airport because there are limited seats on the first flight out (as always). Loreena and Jason arrive at the airport first and easily get tickets. Shana and Jennifer and Kate and Pat arrive next. The rest of the teams are literally biting at their heels. Marianna and Julia get the last seats on the first flight and the rest are bumped back. Ouch.

The next plane leaves 45 minutes later. Not too bad, but every minute counts. The second plane is Aer Lingus whereas the first was British Airways. The first flight goes to London first and then onto Shannon. Of course, the first flight is delayed leaving London. So it would appear that the second flight arrived first. Ain’t that just the way! They’re going to a ferry port and will take the ferry to an island where they’ll find a ruin. At the ruin then they’ll have to sign up for ANOTHER ferry to take the next morning, in increasing time increments. The first flight lands shortly after the second so we have a nice big old glut of teams racing to the ferry port. The first ferry arrives at Inis Mor and the teams get directions to the ruin in question. It’s a pretty big island, as it turns out. Nathan and Jennifer are bickering already, something Kile and I predicted in the first five minutes of the show. The first teams spot the ruins and struggle up the hill to find the ferry signup sheet. Nathan and Jennifer make up. She mentions that was the hardest thing she ever had to do. Oh dear. Donald gets his sneaker stuck on a bush (seriously) so he and his partner were on the last boat. The teams have a nice inn to stay in. It’s warm and dry, that’s what matters. Something they won’t see too often from here on out, I imagine.

The next morning, the first teams take the ferry back to the mainland where they’ll find a vehicle to drive along with their next clue. Cleggan Farm where they’ll take a muddy bike ride to find the next clue. So far, there’s been no skill involved. I’m sure that’ll change shortly. Loreena is freaking out about Jason going the wrong way and I’m worried she’s going to bust a vein in her head if she doesn’t settle down. They stop to get directions and they were going the wrong way but Jason doesn’t seem that concerned. The second ferry arrives and that group gets their start while the first teams arrive at the farms and grab their bikes. Someone’s bike chain breaks, which is unfortunate. TK and Rachel arrive at the Roadblock first. One of the teams must either do a high-wire bike ride while their teammate rides along below. Sounds pretty precarious. TK and Rachel, of course, are very excited about it. All in all, it’s pretty controlled but TK and Rachel manage just fine. They move onto the next clue where they need to chose a donkey and fill its baskets with peat and direct it back to the farm where they’ll get their NEXT clue. The scenery is amazing and makes me want to visit Ireland that much more. Some people choose to be sweet to their donkeys, some people insult theirs. The donkeys have varying degrees of feistiness, which is always fun. Someone, forget who, threatens to eat his donkey while another (donkey, not racer) brays at his team defiantly.

Bad donkey luck continues while Ari and Staella have a horrible time with theirs. TK and Rachel get the next clue first. The Connemara Heritage Center is the first pitstop so they take off, with teams hard on their heels. Azaria and Henndekea are first to the mat and have won a Travelocity vacation to Alberta, Canada. Kynt and Vyksin are team number two, proving that Goths can race too. TK and Rachel are third. Nathan and Jennifer are still stymied by their donkey. Shana and Jennifer (known as hot blonds to everyone else) are currently last but are in high spirits. Good thing, because they soon pass Ari and Staella. Lorena and Jason come in fourth. Nick and Donald come in fifth. Shana and Jennifer come in an amazing 6th place because they had an awesome donkey. Ronald and Christina come in seventh while Kate and Pat were close on their heels at eighth place. Marianna and Julia make it to the mat in ninth place with Nathan and Jennifer (finally) just behind at tenth place. Sadly, Ari and Staella come in last and are eliminated. That was just some BAD donkey luck there. It always sucks to be the first one eliminated.

Yay! “Amazing Race” is back!

Welcome to another installment of the “Roundup“!  I trust you all had a good weekend.  I just recently switched television providers and now have access to the Game Show Network which provides me with LOTS of reality TV reruns.  I’m never at a loss for something to watch!  But, I’m sure you want todays news so here goes:

• “Big Brother 8″s Eric and Jessica are still together, according to an article over at reality blurred.   Right now, it’s a long distance relationship as Jessica finishes up college in Kansas but they still get together for some weekends and for holidays and have plans to reevaluate things once Jessica is “free”.  Apparently, fans are very happy when they see them out and about together.  Sounds as if that’s going to continue, at least for a while.  I hope so, I know those long distance relationships can be tough.  Best of luck to both of them in the future!
• Perhaps you’ve heard that since “Viva Laughlin” was canceled, that “Amazing Race 12″ was bumped up from a mid-winter start to a premiere on November 4 (that’s next Sunday, to you and me).  This is fantastic news for Race fans out there like myself.  And, CBS has recently revealed the identities of the teams that will be racing.  We’re looking at older teams than we saw back in “AR 10″ (before the all-star version), with the average age being 32.  Seeing as how I’m knocking on 32’s door, I don’t think it’s THAT old, but these reality shows have been casting a lot of young people lately so it’s nice to see more “contemporaries”.  Actually, I don’t care how old they are, I just want wait to watch it.  I hope this season lives up to the hype!

That’s all I have time for today.  Don’t forget to watch “DWTS” tonight, we have another round of competition to look forward to!

If you’ve been looking at the CBS fall schedule, you may have noticed that there is a notable omission.  Reality TV great “The Amazing Race” isn’t on it.  Since the show’s premiere, there has been a “Race” in both the fall and spring seasons but in recent years, the ratings have been declining steadily.  So while the next installment has already been filmed, CBS execs have decided to reserve it back for the mid-season.  Which means that we can expect to see Phil on the mat come January or February.  Also, expect to see more younger contestants and no “non-elimination legs”.  I wonder what other changes are in store for my favorite reality show?

Yep, you heard me right. I’m liveblogging the “Amazing Race: All Stars” finale. Woot! I know I may be three hours behind to some of you, but that’s living in the Pacific time zone for you. It’s new to me, that’s what matters.

8:00pm - We get the obligatory “catch up” on everything that has happened so far on the race. My distaste for Charla and Mirna is amplified tenfold. I’m reminded why I wish them harm on a weekly basis. I miss Uchenna and Joyce. And yes, Rob and Amber. BOO!

8:04pm - The Kay Jewelers commercial really annoys me. I hate those kids singing “Happy Mother’s Day”. Yes, you heard me. I hate kids. Stop showing that commercial, please.

8:05pm - It is a surprise to NO ONE that the teams are sent to Hawaii. Let’s see, they were at Guam and they’re going back to the States… hmm. I called that one last week, how about you?

8:07pm - Eric is wearing his retarded “COLEGE” shirt again. I want to punch him.

8:11pm - Wait, I’m a little confused. Please tell me that Charla and Mirna did not get on an EARLIER FLIGHT. Because I really don’t believe that God hates me that much.

8:15pm - OMG, they did. God hates me.

(more…)

Well, this is what I was afraid of. Oswald and Danny couldn’t struggle out of last place last night. I think that even if they had come in second, their “Marked for Elimination” would have seen them gone. I sort of enjoyed them after all. A heck of a lot more than Charla and Mirna or Eric and Danielle. And now, those two cursed teams will be racing for the million. See that? I just got a shiver of dread down my back. Dear God, if the BQ’s don’t win, I may have to throw in the towel on this one.

It was actually a pretty anti-climactic episode, for being so close to the end. The teams traveled to Guam which I don’t know if it should count as a foreign country since there are so many American military bases on it. And the teams spend most of their time on these military bases. But anyhow. The Detour has the teams choosing between taking part in a relief drop exercise or washing the plane. I probably would have chosen the relief drop like Charla and Mirna did, even though it did seem to go rather slowly. So that’s probably the only thing I have in common with them. Though I had to gag a little when they said they chose it because they like to help people. Gimme a break.

The Roadblock had one teammate using a GPS device to locate and rescue an injured soldier and then find the landing zone and call for a helicopter. Really, it looked pretty cool. But I could see that if you were technology challenged you might have difficult time. For those of you keeping track, yes, Charla did this one too. Does Mirna do ANY of the Roadblocks?? And Oswald does so badly, that he and Danny pretty much deserve getting eliminated, even though it pained me so. The BQ’s came in first, though, so there’s that at least.

God, I hope they win. Next week? The season finale. I think I will try to liveblog that one for my Monday column (don’t ask how a Sunday show will be my Monday post, it’ll hurt your head). So if you’re around InternetLand during the finale, come on by and see me cringe, LIVE!

I’ll admit, I didn’t watch all of “American Idol” last night. For pity’s sake, it was two hours long! Yes, it was for charity though and a very, very worthy charity. But I have a husband who is charmed by improv comedy and he wanted to watch “Thank God You’re Here” over on NBC. Good enough. I did tune into the last hour though. And it was good. There were some great performances though I will admit that I rolled my eyes at the whole Celine Dion/Elvis thing. Puhlease. Been there, done that.

No, I was primarily interested in who was going home. All night long we were teased by who was on the hot seat. Improbably, the final two were Chris Richardson and Jordin Sparks. I said to my husband, “Ah, Chris. Oh well, I can understand it.” Then Ryan announced that Chris was safe and my jaw fell off. WHAT?? How could Jordin, the obvious frontrunner, be going home?? Ryan then revealed that Jordin was safe too. No one goes home on charity night, after all.

ARGH!!

You know, I kinda had a feeling something like that would happen. Because Ryan said Tuesday, before any votes were tabulated, that last night’s vote would be “shocking.” I wondered how he knew that. Did he have a crystal ball that I don’t know about? Then again tonight, as the show opened, he mentioned this “shocking” result. The heck?? So I was a little suspicious going in. Still, I don’t appreciate being led along and it didn’t look like Jordin appreciated the shock either. Poor thing was crying.

So next week? We get two that are eliminated. Sweet.

Is it over yet? Nope, not by a long shot. God, I miss Rob and Amber. This week, I continue to want to brutalize Mirna. My feelings are not unusual, people. My husband just last night said, (and I quote) “I just want to bash her face in.” My 70+ year old mother has a strong, STRONG dislike for her. NO ONE likes this woman. Which gets you thinking, how must it be to know that a majority of the world really doesn’t like you? That’d be rough. Doesn’t seem to make her want to start acting any more decently though. UGH. WHY is she and Charla racing so well?? I want them GONE. Bah. Charla, to set the record straight, is a perfectly fine human being. I have no issue with Charla. It’s MIRNA who is the DEVIL.

Ahem. This week continues the race in China but involves some breathtaking scenery and a VERY breathtaking Roadblock where one team member has to jump the highest jump in the world. Basically it’s a HUGE building and they jump off it. Sweet. Mirna, once again, makes Charla do it and she does a very admirable job. Go Charla! But first, there’s a Yield. Dun dun DUUUNNN! Danny and Oswald are in first place and have no plans of using it. However… they are low on cash. So while waiting for the building to open, they ask the BQ’s for money in return for not yielding them. Sounds fair, right? For some reason, they push the envelope further and offer to yield someone of the BQ’s choosing while they’re at it. How can the girls NOT take them up on this? For a measly $45, they ask the boys to yield Eric and Danielle. Why them again? The BQ’s did the sensible thing and asked themselves if they’d rather race against them or Charla and Mirna in the final three. Honestly, I would have made the same choice. But, whatever. The boys should have asked for more $, but they didn’t. Charla and Mirna show up and the boys proceed to bitch to them about selling their souls to the BQ’s. Mirna chides them that she would have given them the money without asking for anything in return. Whatever. The BQ’s didn’t come up with this plan, the boys did so I don’t feel too sorry for them.

Anyhow, that’s the yield drama. Eric and Danielle get yielded and the BQ’s sail to first place and remain there for pretty much the rest of the episode. The boys complain about bad yield karma the rest of the leg but they really do poorly for no other reason than themselves. They just made bad decisions. The BQ’s make it to the pit stop in first place, well deserved on this leg. It’s just plain SAD that they’re my favorites this go around. Shows what a poor selection we have to chose from. Eric and Danielle (surprisingly) make it there in second place. But since they were marked for elimination, they have to wait 30 minutes to check in. During that time, Charla and Mirna show up and check in. GRR. I swear, if I’m left with the BQ’s, Charla and Mirna and Eric and Danielle as the final three I’ll be plenty upset. It looks as if that’ll be what happens too, when Danny and Oswald (who got lost on their Detour) fail to check in before Eric and Danielle’s 30 minutes are up. But then… it’s ANOTHER NON-ELIMINATION leg. I can’t take much more of this, people. But, it seems as if I have two more weeks to take. Dear god.

If Charla and Mirna win the race, I’m gonna pitch the mother of all hissy fits.

So what happened on “Amazing Race: All Stars” last night? Not really anything at all. You’d think being down at the Final Four, mere days from the finish of the race there would be plenty happening. But not so much. The most interesting news is that the teams traveled to Honk Kong, China and the tasks they needed to complete there were appropriately awesome. Danny and Oswald snagged the fast forward by riding in a stunt car that raced around before purposefully flipping onto it’s side and then righting itself again. It was amazing. So they made it first to the mat, to the surprise of no one. I’m hoping either them or the BQ’s win. Yes, I said the BQ’s. I know, I’m just as surprised as you are. But I lurve Donny and Oswald a wee bit more so they’re my current front-runners. The rest of the teams got to climb bamboo scaffolding, being careful to avoid the flying, fighting ninjas around them. Oh yes, flying fighting ninjas indeed! So that was pretty cool. The next task required running around an abandonned building and kicking in doors. I bet that was great for working out race aggression. Surprisingly, Charla was pretty good at this. As she said, she’s got great strength in her legs and she was proud to be able to showcase that. The BQ’s made it to the mat second and the producers tried their darndest to make it seem like it was neck and neck between Charla and Mirna and Eric and Danielle, but I knew Eric and Danielle were significantly behind. I should have been less surprised that it was a non-elimination leg. After all, the finale episode almost always starts off with four teams and I don’t remember anyone saying last night was going to be the finale. So, whatever. They’re marked for elimination, big deal.

Okay, onto the annoying things from last night: Danielle’s rack. I couldn’t take my eyes off it and I’m a girl. I kept wondering if it’d just up and bounce out of that ridiculous excuse for a top she was wearing. Also annoying about Danielle (there are so many things, I know) are her eyebrows. Why do some women do that? Pluck off nearly every hint at an eyebrow? They look absurd. I wanted to get a sharpie and color them in for half the show last night. Mirna’s never ending prattling is beyond old too. She thought she was so clever, coining the term “Yield Karma”, insinuating that the BQ’s yielding of Eric and Danielle will come back to haunt them. Because using a race-sanctioned strategy is a bad thing to do, apparently. But then, wait, in the scenes from next week’s episode, was it not Charla and Mirna plotting to yield the BQ’s? Riiiight. You know, Mirna can just be quiet any minute now. I’m so tired of listening to her. And, despite Danny and Oswald’s siding with Charla and Mirna, they are just too adorable to hate. So I’ll let it slide. Just this once.

First off, many apologies for the lack of postage on Friday. I was KO’d by an unexpected DSL emergency. Luckily, my modem has been replaced and I’m back in business. Let’s just say that 24+ hours of no internet is nothing short of torture for a geek like me. I hope not to have to suffer such a horror ever, ever again.

Now, onto the good stuff. Well, okay, that might be overstating things. I don’t know if I’d call this season of “Amazing Race” good. Strange, to be sure. I have the feeling that I’m watching Bizarro World “Amazing Race”. Everything is like the direct opposite of how it should be. What the heck?

1. Rob and Amber are eliminated early, beaten out by CHARLA AND MIRNA. The only solace I receive is they weren’t outlived by David and Mary who have literally negative racing skillz.
2. I actually find myself enjoying the BQ’s. After last season and my hatred of them and their catiness, the fact that I can stand them would be entirely out of character. But liking them? What the HECK?
3. Uchenna and Joyce making stupid flight scheduling mistakes and getting elminated. I was already sort of surprised at their near elimination before but this takes the freakin’ cake. I’m amazed and disappointed. This season is really kinda sucking, isn’t it?
4. How wrong is it that the Frat Boyz were gone so soon? I was looking forward to enjoying Kevin and Drew and was so sad to see them go. In a perfect world, they would have certainly outlasted annoying teams like Eric and Danielle and Charla and Mirna.
5. Speaking of, how are these two consistently leading the pack? I about lost my lunch when they got the first flight to Kuala Lumpur. They came in second to last last week and now they’re in FIRST? What the HECK?!?

So yeah, maybe you can understand a little of my confusion. There’s just an awful lot about this show that isn’t making ANY sense.

And let me just say, that Eric and Danielle calling the BQ’s “dirty, dirty hookers” and “shady bitches” simply because they dared to try to win the race and yield them was truly disgusting. Also disgusting? The cookie task. I’m sorry, but I HATE black licorice and if I had to bite into a bazillion cookies to find one with a licorice center I think I’d have to kill myself. I had a hard time not retching just watching it. BLECH! And, back to Eric and Danielle (since I have transferred my hatred of the BQ’s to them), I hate his “Colege” shirt. It drives me up the wall. Why is that supposed to be funny? I don’t think that’s funny. I think it’s retarded. It makes me want to slug him. Hard. Also retarded is how Oswald and Danny would NOT decide on a task. OMG, just pick one and do it. If Charla and Mirna win the million, I’m blaming you guys. “Broughten”? SO not a word. UGH.

Anyhow. Obviously I’m just in a mood over this show. I need to get over it. It’s not going to be an awesome season. Get used to the idea and move on.