Watching Reality TV

Wow, talk about a lot of news! If you missed this most awesome night, check these recaps:

• Big Brother Craze
• TV Squad
• Television without Pity
• CBS.com’s recap and full episode video

Buckle your seatbelts, everyone! Big Brother is in motion and it’s not going to stop until two people have left the building! I’m irrationally excited about this, even though my favorites look to be in dire jeopardy. So let’s get going, shall we? Dick starts off the duplicity by telling Jameka she’s going home this week, causing her to be rather upset in the DR later. She tells Jessica, who in turn tells Eric. They both feel pretty secure and why shouldn’t they? They’re allied with Dick and Daniele and have been told that the target is Jameka. ‘Nuff said, right? Alas, those Donato’s are tricky folks.

Eric’s task is to vote Jameka. Thank goodness. Eric asks Daniele point blank if Jessica is going home. Daniele point blank lies to his face. Because of course they want Eric to be blindsided by her departure so he cannot properly compete for HoH. GRR. So we get right into things and each nominee speaks their piece. Did Dick make the offer to Jameka? Did she take it? Hard to tell from her speech but I’ll say yes. Jessica is near tears during her speech, I think she knows. GAH. Eric votes first for Jameka and Dick and Daniele predictably vote for Jessica. BOO! Turds. So Jessica is being sent packing.

Yeah, see, no one looks surprised. Eric and Jessica share a big hug and I hear Eric say, “I’m sorry.” She hugs Jameka, she’s crying. Daniele and Dick have hidden themselves, along with Zach. TURDS! Don’t even say goodbye or anything! Eric is not surprised. Says he’s not upset, he understands. But he looks shaken. Jameka is crying. Eric kinda shames Daniele for not telling him when he asked. Good! He should! Julie asks some anti-Eric questions from Jessica which is sort of surprising. Who’s side are you on here, CBS? Jessica does say she loves Eric and her feelings are real. The goodbye messages are pretty good. Eric’s message is just gut-wrenching. Poor guy. Honestly, these two have risen to the top and will be favored, I’m pretty sure, once this is all over.

So the HoH competition begins. Only Dick, Daniele and Eric are competing since Jameka has one more week that she can’t compete. I wish the best for Eric but Dick wins out. Dangit. This is going from bad to worse isn’t it? At least he’s only HoH for like, 30 minutes. Ha! Or you know, until Sunday at the most. I think? Shoot, who knows. I give up. This whole next week’s schedule sorta has me confused so I might need a minute to figure it all out. Apparently, America wants Daniele to get nominated (you think so??), but like HELL Dick is going to put her up on the block. So yeah, whatever. We all know Jameka and Eric are going up. DUH.

We come back to a lot of whispering that of course no one can hear or understand. And as if it’s even a question about what Dick is going to do. Eric looks nervous, he knows what’s going to happen. Dick makes noises about how much this sucks and nominates Jameka and Eric. Ya think so?? It’s all “game”. Which, yeah, of course it is. Still sucks though. Veto is next! Wee! Shoot, that was a short segment there, wasn’t it? Back to commercials!

Blah blah, back to the show, time for veto competition! Jameka is disqualified but it appears it’s arguable whether she should have been or not. Zach wins veto and of course, everything will continue as planned. GAH. Why NOT keep Eric at this point? What threat is he without Jessica in the house? Against him in the final two, he’s not likely to be a risk. In fact, Dick would stand a chance against him and this is DICK we’re talking about. So taking out Eric is excessive in my opinion.

So will Zach use veto? NOPE! Shocker! See ya, Eric. Nice to know ya. Suckers. It’d serve them right if we ended up with Zach and Jameka as the final two. It totally would. And then I’d have to go shoot myself because OH MY GOD. So Jameka and Eric plead their cases and I’m more convinced than ever that Jameka took the Donato’s deal. Eric obviously feels the stink of Dick and Daniele’s betrayal. Zach votes Eric, Daniele votes Eric. SHOCKER. Boo. Ya’ll suck.

Eric gives Jameka a big hug and (wow) hugs and says farewell to everyone else too. Jameka looks like she feels a little shamed as Daniele hugs her and YEP, looks like she made a deal with the devil. And knows it too. Shoot, Eric didn’t even have time to pack his bags! Raw! Eric says he’s at peace with everything. Being America’s Player was tough on his strategy, because he would have chosen to do things differently. Amber and Dustin would have stayed longer, Dick and Daniele would have been gone. Oh, and Zach. Just shows that America is pretty stupid when it comes to BB strategy. He says he didn’t have a showmance, he had genuine feelings and that Jessica was a “perfect partner”. Good show, Eric. He got $40,000. Not too bad. BOO.

BOO!!! America, you all officially suck. If Zach wins Big Brother I’m gonna hurt someone.