Watching Reality TV

First off, let’s not forget the all-important recaps.

• Big Brother Craze
• TV Squad
• Television Without Pity
• CBS.com’s recap and full episode video.

If you were expecting some enormous shakeup in the house this week, then you were sorely mistaken during last night’s show. Despite Julie’s assuring us it had been an “explosive” week. Riiight. About the most explosive you got were Jen’s little temper fits. Anyhow, let’s get into the show.

Jen muses that Daniele is a liar which might not be entirely untrue but I don’t think she can really blame Daniele either. Still, didn’t believe Daniele for an instant when she assured Jen she was sorry. Right off, Jen gets into it with Dick claiming she’s not bitter when there’s her picture in the dictionary right next to the word “bitter”. She has a “meeting” with Daniele while she’s packing for her fabulous NYC getaway. Daniele tries to throw her a bone by saying she and herself are the biggest competitors in the house. Mm. Yeah.

Daniele and Amber take off on their fabulous trip while the rest of them sit around and mope. Jen goes on and on about she just can’t go to the sequester house. She couldn’t stand it. Dick blows smoke in her face and this causes Jen to get super upset and go in and pack her things. Good thinking, eh? She also started to cook which was a little surprising since in that one veto competition she gave up food in order to go on slop. Girls getting REBELLIOUS! Then she does the unthinkable. She takes Dick’s cigarettes and smashes them up and throws them away. So that’s why she packed her things, cuz she feared retaliation. OOOH, boy. Girl’s going to hell. Dick notices right away, of course and knows she did it. Aaaand, Nice Dick is gone. Vanished like a fart in the wind.

So Dick found her stuff (didn’t hide it well did she?) and took it to the HoH room to hold it for “ransom”. And he’s still looking for the cigarettes. And she’s totally eating real food. What a BRAT. Jessica called her a cheater and that’s about accurate, I’m thinking. Everyone else was just DISGUSTED. And… then she got called to the diary room.

BB gave her a spanking in the form of “penalty vote” against during eviction. So not so much for destroying Dick’s property as it was for breaking BB rules. And then… wow. Okay, Dick was smoking his cigarette and whatever. Jen was eating in front of him and for whatever reason got annoyed with him and was getting in his face. He told her not to touch him. She wasn’t listening. He repeated his request. She kept pestering him. She told him not to blow smoke in her face so what did he do? He blew smoke in her face. Dude, I could have told her he’d do that. She got FURIOUS and tried to grab the cigarette out of his hand. He threatened to burn her with the cigarette if she didn’t back off. She, of course, refused to back off so he tried to get with his cigarette. And then she acted all horrified that he burnt her. How DARE he?? This woman is too stupid to live.

Right in the midst of that uber-drama, we get to watch Daniele and Amber’s great NYC adventure. Blah blah blah cross show promotion blah blah blah. Amber is certain the audience is going to love her. Yeah, not if they’ve been watching “Big Brother” they won’t. And that’s about all we saw of that.

Julie does a quick interview with the houseguests. She asks Amber and Daniele about their “day of freedom” and blah blah blah perspective blah blah regroup… you know, the standard response. Oooh, and Jen is the first person in 8 years to break food restrictions and get a penalty vote. Dumbass. Gee, I wonder who’s going home? Yawn. Julie talks briefly with Daniele who says she’s very thankful to Eric and Jessica for saving her dad. Oh and she’d like to sit with her dad in the final 2 because duh, she’d totally win that way! Ha! Too funny. Once again back with the housemates, where Jen and Jameka do their final “plead”. Jen is making me want to barf (and no, that’s not the morning sickness talking) and Jameka looks like the classiest woman alive standing up there next to Jen. Aaaand onto the voting!

Is anyone surprised here? You? Me? ANYONE? Jen is gone gone gone. The votes, unsurprisingly, are unanimous. And she’s gone. Eric says, beautifully, “As happy as you are to be leaving, we’re happier to see you go.” Truer words, there! The houseguests muse that Jen’s controversial picture DOES look better in black and white. Snort. Even her interview with Julie was just downright absurd. How did she stay in the house this long? I’m amazed. So off she goes to sequester. I don’t think Dustin deserves that, do you? The recorded messages are predictable. But most people really reined it in, like Jessica and Eric. Everyone is TOTALLY kissing up to the new jury member, which is disgusting. I’m just annoyed I’m going to have to see her again.

So who will be HoH? Daniele and Jameka are out of the running, and the rest are playing “Tanks for the Memories” where each player is situated above a water tank. If they answer incorrectly, Jen will get to push the button that plunges them into the water. Oh dear. Eric gets dunked first. Jen looked like she enjoyed that a little too much. Amber, Zach and Dick are dunked next, leaving Jessica as the winner and HoH. Again. This sure is setting up for a Eric, Jessica, Dick and Daniele final four, isn’t it?