Watching Reality TV

Yep, you heard me right. I’m liveblogging the “Amazing Race: All Stars” finale. Woot! I know I may be three hours behind to some of you, but that’s living in the Pacific time zone for you. It’s new to me, that’s what matters.

8:00pm - We get the obligatory “catch up” on everything that has happened so far on the race. My distaste for Charla and Mirna is amplified tenfold. I’m reminded why I wish them harm on a weekly basis. I miss Uchenna and Joyce. And yes, Rob and Amber. BOO!

8:04pm - The Kay Jewelers commercial really annoys me. I hate those kids singing “Happy Mother’s Day”. Yes, you heard me. I hate kids. Stop showing that commercial, please.

8:05pm - It is a surprise to NO ONE that the teams are sent to Hawaii. Let’s see, they were at Guam and they’re going back to the States… hmm. I called that one last week, how about you?

8:07pm - Eric is wearing his retarded “COLEGE” shirt again. I want to punch him.

8:11pm - Wait, I’m a little confused. Please tell me that Charla and Mirna did not get on an EARLIER FLIGHT. Because I really don’t believe that God hates me that much.

8:15pm - OMG, they did. God hates me.

8:16pm - Dear God, the BQ’s are in last place. *sob* There better be an equalizer at some point.

8:19pm - With the Detour, I’d TOTALLY do the “Under”. Having to balance on that board and everything would be awful. I could rock diving down to fetch the clue though.

8:21pm - I’m mad now. Is it too late to boycott the finale? Charla and Mirna are STILL in first place.

8:25pm - Oh HECK ya! Charla and Mirna have been passed up by both teams. Yahoo! I’m a little miffed that it’s Eric and Danielle in the lead but I’m finding them a tad less objectionable. Now… if only the BQ’s could just get their act in gear…

8:27pm - Oooh, finale fake-out! Teams are traveling to the Old Mint in San Francisco. This could be great at giving some teams a leg up over others. Or… it could be an equalizer. Ugh.

8:32pm - Charla and Mirna seem surprised at how hard that task was. Uhm, hello. This is the finale. It’s supposed to be hard. I can remember a time when the teams would STRUGGLE so hard in the last episodes. I’d thought things were getting kinda easy lately, but it was nice to see something that wasn’t just a cake walk for everyone.

8:35pm - Equalizer it is. Damnit.

8:37pm - I am resisting spoilers that I know are out there. I want to have an untainted “liveblogging” experience here.

8:40pm - BQ’s are in the lead! WOO HOO! It’s a challenge that requires teams to test their knowledge of the past/other teams. Interesting! Sounds like it could be complex. Go girls, go!

8:45pm - Don’t you find yourself wanting to yell out the answers? This is nerve-wracking.

8:46pm - Oh crap, it’s the finish line! And Eric and Danielle are in the lead! ACK!

8:47pm - Interesting that there’s a 10 minute time limit. Even if they don’t finish, they still get to run to the finish. But the BQ’s are two minutes behind Eric and Danielle. Let’s hope that Charla and Mirna are WAAAAAY behind.

8:49pm - BOO. BOOO!! It’s Eric and Danielle. SO much better than Charla and Mirna, but dangit. I wanted the BQ’s to win. Bummer.

8:50pm - Aww, they’re kinda cute. Okay, I can live with that. And I can totally live with the BQ’s in second. And I am loving Charla and Mirna in third. HA! HA HA HA HA!

8:53pm - Oh, shut up Mirna. Yes, we got to know you. And no, that’s NOT a good thing.

Okay, it’s over. Now, let us never speak of it again. Never again should they attempt another All-Stars. And if I have to see Charla and Mirna on my television screen ever again I’m gonna consider that an act of war.